From The Pocket Muse: A character arrives at work to find her chair missing. What happened to it?
Ms. Grace entered her cubicle, looked at her coworkers as usual, booted up her computer as usual, straightened her hair as usual, and sat down as usual, all without looking. This was unfortunate, as her chair was no longer there, and she ended up on the floor, rather a harder landing than expected, which caused her to emit a loud whoop. After gathering up the few remaining scattered fragments of her shattered dignity, she stood up, called out to the entire room, "Where Is My Chair?!" (literally in title case), and promptly fell out of the center of attention as everyone speculated on the chair's mysterious vanishment.
"Maybe it fell into a miniature black hole which closed up immediately after it and transported it to another dimension," guessed Mr. Roberts.
"No way, Occam's razor cuts that to shreds. What obviously happened is that it was eaten by beavers," rejoined Mrs. Lane.
"Are you crazy? That chair wasn't even made of wood! How the heck would beavers have eaten a metal and plastic chair--and where would they go afterwards?" Mr. Roberts said heatedly, angry at the dismissal of his theory.
"It still makes a lot more sense than your stupid black hole," Mrs. Lane responded, and would have started a fight but Mr. Johnson got in the way.
"There's no need for fighting--you're both wrong," he advised them. "Obviously, the chair grew legs and ran away."
"That's just nonsense," said Mrs. Lane and Mr. Roberts in unison. Surprised by their agreement, they stopped, stunned, and never reentered the discussion, too amazed to speak further.
Mrs. Samuel had something to say though. "Chairs don't grow legs, you fool!" she yelled at Mr. Johnson. "Obviously someone here took it!"
Awkward silence. Everyone looked at everyone else (except Mrs. Lane and Mr. Roberts, who were still completely out of it). Then Mr. Johnson spoke up. "Rubbish! I never heard anything so stupid in my entire life! The chair grew legs, I know it, I can see it--well, in my mind I can. Any other explanation is bunkum!"
And with that the discussion began again, louder and more heated than ever (except, of course, for Mrs. Lane and Mr. Roberts, who were still staring at each other). Everyone was shouting, violence was threatening, the room was disintegrating into chaos...then Mr. Johnson (looking for support for his legs theory) asked Johnny, who inhabited the cubicle in the corner, what he thought. "You haven't said anything yet. What's your idea?"
"I don't have one," the boy replied into the general lull. "Although I think your idea is the best."
"You see, you see??!" shouted Mr. Johnson, and the fighting started right back up again.
Meanwhile, Johnny remained sitting quietly in his cubicle. He was the only one who hadn't stood up at the beginning of the dispute--and with good reason: he was sitting on Ms. Grace's chair.
"Maybe it fell into a miniature black hole which closed up immediately after it and transported it to another dimension," guessed Mr. Roberts.
"No way, Occam's razor cuts that to shreds. What obviously happened is that it was eaten by beavers," rejoined Mrs. Lane.
"Are you crazy? That chair wasn't even made of wood! How the heck would beavers have eaten a metal and plastic chair--and where would they go afterwards?" Mr. Roberts said heatedly, angry at the dismissal of his theory.
"It still makes a lot more sense than your stupid black hole," Mrs. Lane responded, and would have started a fight but Mr. Johnson got in the way.
"There's no need for fighting--you're both wrong," he advised them. "Obviously, the chair grew legs and ran away."
"That's just nonsense," said Mrs. Lane and Mr. Roberts in unison. Surprised by their agreement, they stopped, stunned, and never reentered the discussion, too amazed to speak further.
Mrs. Samuel had something to say though. "Chairs don't grow legs, you fool!" she yelled at Mr. Johnson. "Obviously someone here took it!"
Awkward silence. Everyone looked at everyone else (except Mrs. Lane and Mr. Roberts, who were still completely out of it). Then Mr. Johnson spoke up. "Rubbish! I never heard anything so stupid in my entire life! The chair grew legs, I know it, I can see it--well, in my mind I can. Any other explanation is bunkum!"
And with that the discussion began again, louder and more heated than ever (except, of course, for Mrs. Lane and Mr. Roberts, who were still staring at each other). Everyone was shouting, violence was threatening, the room was disintegrating into chaos...then Mr. Johnson (looking for support for his legs theory) asked Johnny, who inhabited the cubicle in the corner, what he thought. "You haven't said anything yet. What's your idea?"
"I don't have one," the boy replied into the general lull. "Although I think your idea is the best."
"You see, you see??!" shouted Mr. Johnson, and the fighting started right back up again.
Meanwhile, Johnny remained sitting quietly in his cubicle. He was the only one who hadn't stood up at the beginning of the dispute--and with good reason: he was sitting on Ms. Grace's chair.
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