XI. Dialogue, Description, Action

Take one of the two sets of dialogue (I chose the one from post X) and add action and description to it.

The TORTURE MASTER crumples to the floor, seemingly in slow motion, the TRANQ DART stuck in his neck.

JOE

(most surprised)

What are you.........

DON

Do not worry. I have come to rescue you....

For the first time DON gets a good look at JOE. He trails off, bemused.

DON (CONT'D)

(wondering half to himself)

Are you really Joe? Are you the man who I raced thousands of miles to find, in great danger to myself and my own sanity, because he holds the knowledge that will help me salvage my career?

JOE

(his confusion turning slowly to anger)

Well, I'm Joe. And all I did was doing some research on this Dr. Nope character, which shoulda been my ticket to the big time, but then they kidnapped me and now they've strapped me to this damn table and, you know, how about you getting me OFF OF IT!!!

He tries to shake his bonds to emphasize his point, but they're too tight to move and he gives up, spent.

DON

(placatingly)

Hold on. You are obviously the man I was trying to find. I will loose your bonds for you, and then we shall escape. But... I just... was not expecting.... that...

JOE

That what? Spit it out already...and then get me off this table. It's damn uncomfortable. And cold.

DON somewhat grudgingly heads over to the TABLE and begins UNDOING JOE's FETTERS while trying to explain.

DON

All right. You are just... somewhat less... imposing than than I expected. I had only a portrait picture to go on, and that promised somewhat more.

JOE

Seriously? THAT's your entire problem? How about you stop obsessing about my looks...

At this point, DON has removed the last of JOE's bonds. JOE STANDS on cramped legs to his entire unimpressive height and shouts up at DON's face.

JOE (CONT'D)

...and start thinking about how to get me OUT of this place? Huh?

The starting of a distant ALARM catches DON's attention. He slowly awakes from his daze.

DON

I suppose that would be an excellent choice, yes.

As the pounding of RUNNING FEET approaches the TORTURE CHAMBER, DON makes a snap decision and PULLS a surprised JOE with him out of the torture chamber towards the EMERGENCY STAIRS.

While I'm Posting Things...

... I might as well add this note. I'm still behind on the WE's (and probably will be for much of the near future), so I've got to find another way to break up the many official script-related posts I'm churning out. So I thought I'd take this time to note for posterity that on this day I finally added my blog description to the header up above.

This announcement serves two purposes: one, I get to inform anyone who reads this post that that description up top was put there only after 22 posts had already gone up and was not there from the beginning as one might reasonably have expected. I could leave this benign misapprehension uncorrected, but somehow I feel the need to clarify. And two, as noted above, I get to once again divide and conquer the relentless march of Roman numeraled posts.

In other words, I get to satisfy, again, my bizarrely strict yet unreasonably arbitrary* code of aesthetics.

*Fun fact: in my quest to get this word exactly right, I looked up the English translation for the German "willkürlich". That is, I did the exact same thing I was just describing--while writing its description!!!

X. Story-Advancing Dialogue

From The Escape, a fragment of dialogue that moves the story forward. Because I started my script earlier, I can just cut&paste(&format) a segment I already finished...

DON

(flabbergasted)

FIRED???!!

HANDLER

Well, you’re not really fired per se. You’ve just been indefinitely suspended from receiving another assignment.

DON

(petulantly, and rhetorically)

And how does that make it any better?

(then, sharply)

WHY?

HANDLER

(sighing)

You know why, Don.

DON

(crushed)

It’s because of Syria, is it not.

HANDLER

That — and your ridiculous obsession with this “Dr. Nope” character. We’ve told you so many times there’s nothing in it.

DON

But....

HANDLER

(cutting in)

It's a myth, an urban legend, completely fabricated nonsense. And you still won't let go of it. That's your problem: you're too unreliable.

DON

Am I given any second chances?

HANDLER

We'll call you if we need you.

(hesitates, seeing DON’S hopeful expression)

Oh, all right. You get ONE call. And if it's another wild goose chase, you're done. Do you understand?

DON

I do.

HANDLER

(not quite sincere)

Good. I'm sure we'll see each other again sometime.

Incredibly, Still More Explanations

Yep. More explanatory overhead. If you are in my Creative Writing class, you do not need to read this. You already know it. There's no need to waste your time.

But if you're not, you may well be wondering (if you know something about Script Frenzy) what I am doing uploading Script Frenzy-related posts in May when the Script Frenzy month is April... The answer is that due to various logistical reasons, I was still learning the basics in mid-April. Then I began, very slowly, to write, while still not finished with the preparations. I began, roughly, on April 16th and wrote for a week and a half... that gave me 12 pages (I revised way too much--oops). Meanwhile, preparations were still ongoing, and I completed them contemporaneously. Then I was away from the computer for almost one full week and could do nothing. And that brings us up to today, when I'm trying to finish the last preparatory assignments to finally concentrate all my writing on the script.

Interesting deadline calculations approach. I already missed the official April 30th deadline. Our class deadline is now May 31st. But I started two weeks early (or late, depending on your frame of reference) and want to stick to the goal of one month of writing. As a result, depending on whether or not you count the lost week as elapsed writing time, my self-imposed deadline would be either the 15th or the 20th of May, respectively. My guess is, however, that I will end up meeting only the May 31st deadline, as I write too slowly and revise too much...

IX. Relationship-Defining Dialogue

From The Escape, a fragment of dialogue that defines the relationship between two characters. I again spent WAY, way too much time on formatting.

JOE

(most surprised)

What are you.........

DON

Do not worry. I have come to rescue you....

(wondering half to himself)

Are you really Joe? Are you the man who I raced thousands of miles to find, in great danger to myself and my own sanity, because he holds the knowledge that will help me salvage my career?

JOE

(his confusion turning slowly to anger)

Well, I'm Joe. And all I did was doing some research on this Dr. Nope character, which shoulda been my ticket to the big time, but then they kidnapped me and now they've strapped me to this damn table and, you know, how about you getting me OFF OF IT!!!

DON

(placatingly)

Hold on. You are obviously the man I was trying to find. I will loose your bonds for you, and then we shall escape. But... I just... was not expecting.... that...

JOE

That what? Spit it out already...and then get me off this table. It's damn uncomfortable. And cold.

DON

All right. You are just... somewhat less... imposing than than I expected. I had only a portrait picture to go on, and that promised somewhat more.

JOE

Seriously? That's your entire problem? How about you stop obsessing about my looks and start thinking about how to get me out of this place? Huh?

DON

I suppose that would be an excellent choice, yes.